REVIEW: The Monuments Men

4/10  - Like Ocean's Eleven during WW2! I bet no one has made that joke yet...

George Clooney can pitch one hell of a movie. When George is explaining how great this movie is going to be, everyone listens. Hell, based on the trailer I was sold. Unfortunately he's a better seller then closer. This movie sucks. Big time.

It's difficult to pin down exactly the failure of a film like The Monuments Men. Technically the direction is beautiful. The cast is pretty solid all around, maybe not idea for the roles in my opinion, but memorable characters nonetheless. It's hard to fault the writing when it's based on a true story, and it's quite an uplifting unbelievable story. But you know what? I'm going to blame the writing, sorry Georgie.

The script is lacking any suspense, and frankly any direction. The narrative is so filled with self worth and nostalgia that it looses the audience halfway through. It's as if the pride of telling this particular story is supposed to make it an inherently better story. I actually think this story would be great if told by the right person. The threat of Nazi soldiers bearing down should be paramount. But it's not just you their after, the value of the cultural heritage that they would also destroy. It's a story with mountains of potential.

What really happens in The Monuments Men is quite dull. There are two obvious plots that are laid out like train tracks at the beginning. There are some illustrious men recruited for this covert mission. The reputation of these men lies solely in your ability to recognize them as actors and attribute them a reputation you feel is worthwhile. Then the value of the art is somehow minimized as well. One particular statue is given personal emotional value, which I suppose should raise the stakes for all the art, but that doesn't really happen. Converse to the intention of giving the art more meaning it seems to actually lose meaning as the story progresses. The movie's ultimate downfall is it's lack of opposition. This is clearly a worthwhile mission, and the enemy in this case seems to be apathy. No one wants to help these guys save the art. There might be a war going on that's keeping them occupied, but who knows really, they're a bunch of jerks for not helping. Some Nazi's sort of get in their way, but it's all a big shrug. They show up and get it done.

One of my favorite films in recent history is Argo, another loose adaptation of factual events. Like in The Monuments Men it's quite obvious how the ending will turn out if you've paid attention to history at all. Argo manages to make the audience compelled to the great characters through giving them high stakes and great motivations. Another film that might compare is Ocean's Eleven which also plays a fast and loose game with the audience of high stakes for a big payout. The failing of The Monuments Men lies entirely in it's inability to raise the stakes. Had this been a nail biter at the end, many other flaws could have been forgiven. This movie is like getting halfway through Oceans and watching Danny Ocean lay out the plan to film the vault ahead of time and steal the money pretending to be the SWAT team. There would be no reason to watch the ending. No suspense. No intrigue.

This has been a bit of a hot-topic lately but I'm also way over the all white male cast thing. Along with The Grand Budapest Hotel, The Monuments Men is a film with a notably large cast, meant to be a ensemble. When you lineup an ensemble cast and it's all the same race, gender, and age range, that's disappointing. I'm sure the argument for historical accuracy could be made, but let's be honest. The Cate Blanchett character is a throwaway meant to represent nothing but a female prize who needs to be saved. It's all just a little too safe and easy. Is it really that scary to change the point of view everyone once in a while? The movie, like the cast, is just too bland.


IMDb - The Monuments Men (6.1)
Wikipedia - The Monuments Men
Rotten Tomatoes - The Monuments Men (32%)
Amazon.ca - The Monuments Men