REVIEW: Odd Thomas

4/10 – Hey Gang! Let’s all get in the Mystery Machine!

Dear lord I hope they change this poster

A great novel does not mean a great film. The thing that bugged me most about this movie is that it felt like I wasn't in on a big joke. There's clearly something captivating about the novel by Dean Koontz 'Odd Thomas' to warrant a film with a decent budget. I didn't get it. 

The current film summary claims that Odd is a short order cook with extraordinary power! He is a short order cook in one scene, so take the humble beginnings aspect with a grain of salt. Our "hero" also has a built in powers that are never explained, to prevent him from actually having to work hard at anything. He "senses" evil, sees what will happen in his dreams, and can "magnetically" find the bad guys. This kid is the worst detective ever.

The number of “writing rules” that are broken in Odd Thomas fundamentally bothers me. It’s lazy writing. Granted, it’s from a novel so I can’t blame the screenwriter, but maybe blame Koontz a little. It’s just one cliché after another in this universe. Good people are good. Bad people are bad.

Anton Yelchin is a great actor, but Odd as a character is paper thin. Odd is a good guy, who is given the answers to solve crimes, he just has to show up and do it, without any internal struggle or conflict. He is a perfect person who has extra abilities and no flaws. The characters aren't improved with "Stormy" either, she flops on screen. As the second Mary Sue, she is immaculate, brilliant, and the source of all of Odd's happiness. Good people are good. Bad people are bad.

Every character also falls into the "single child with no parents" universe which just doesn't work, especially when trying to develop a small town atmosphere. No one has any relation to one another. I get it; these things work better in a novel. In a film like this it only serves to make those characters even more distant and unrelatable. They are on a pedestal, and I just want to see them get knocked down.

Anton Yelchin as Odd Thomas

The bad guys have the weakest motivation I think I’ve ever witnessed in a movie. Frankly that isn’t new for Stephen Sommers, (The Mummy, The Mummy Returns, The Mummy Does More Bad Things, We Ran Out of Mummies, Honey I Shrunk the Mummy) But of course this is going to be a mystery if there is literally no way to solve the crime because it’s entirely spontaneous. They just appear and do bad things because they feel like it. I can’t stress enough how much this movie turns into an episode of Scooby Doo by the end. Odd Thomas runs to the baddie and rips their mask off saying "it was Old Man McGuffin all along" and then everything is right in the world again. Good people are good. Bad people are bad.

I’m making this sound unwatchable. If you want to sit down and watch a movie with some light harmless action and very little detective work by a bunch of detectives, this movie is for you! If you thought Cabin in the Woods was terrible because you didn't bother to think about what was happening, this movie is also for you! It’s not a total fail. It has a mystery element that is genuinely surprising. It also keeps things relatively fast paced because people need to run everywhere, all the time.

Odd Thomas actually does a good job of creating high stakes at the very beginning of the movie, not letting the audience wait around for that to happen. It falters though when they have to maintain those high stakes throughout the rest of the film, because by the end I wasn't very concerned. It also tries so hard to maintain the smart, quick, witty dialogue that it forgets to make the movie smart and witty.

I’d love to hear other people’s opinions on this movie but without a wide release there aren't many reviews up. I have no doubt that a ton of people will think this movie is fantastic. But for me, it should have been a 22 minute cartoon with a doggie sidekick.

IMDB - Odd Thomas (6.6)
Wikipedia - Odd Thomas Movie
Rotten Tomatoes - Odd Thomas (No Reviews)
Amazon.ca - Odd Thomas

REVIEW: 3, 2, 1.... Frankie Go Boom

5/10 - Yes, that's the real title. I assume someone was on mushrooms when it was chosen.

This movie left me disappointed. I felt like a soccer mom, rooting for my kids team, but they still got pummeled.

Frankie Go Boom shares the story of a young man who becomes an internet laughing stock at the hands of his brother. Twice. It's supposed to be a heartwarming story about a man learning to live with his dysfunctional family, finding love after getting his heart broken, and doing so while playing dress-up as a vulgar comedy. It unfortunately fails on all three fronts.

I will say that this is absolutely not a horrible train wreck. It's entertaining and might even by hysterical in the right mindset. The cast is a fantastic ensemble for a lower budget movie. I think every actor improves on the character that was written in the script. It has some unfiltered and unedited moments of comic inspiration, but that just isn't enough.

Lizzy Caplan and Charlie Hunnam are fine as Lassie and Frankie. Just fine. Chris O'Dowd is still quite funny and charming, but I suspect he was put on a leash.

I think that Frankie was trying to go for the Little Miss Sunshine vibe of being sweet and optimistic despite the chaos. Sadly, aside from one climactic moment of real emotion, nothing about this feels optimistic or charming, or even relatable by the end. I don't really ever believe anything important is at stake. The ending just sort of happens, the same way characters just sort of appear and disappear in the movie. All and all it just feels wishy-washy. There are great ideas but it never goes for the jugular. This movie has the balls to put Ron Perlman in drag and feature a blowjob nightmare, but it still doesn't make me laugh or feel fresh.

I would love for other writers to weigh in on where they think Frankie goes wrong, and how they would have done things differently to make it better.

IMDb - Frankie Go Boom (5.6)
Wikipedia - Frankie Go Boom
Rotten Tomatoes - Frankie Go Boom (41%)
Amazon.ca - Frankie Go Boom

REVIEW: Spring Breakers

7/10 - Watching this movie felt like an acid trip.

Summer time… perfect for a fun, exciting, sexy movie adventure. Just not Spring Breakers.

This movie is a dramatic exploration of party culture. It’s surrounded by sex, booze, music, drugs, and guns, but unlike other movies, it’s not about that stuff, its about girls who get lost in that world. Possibly why so many Disney stars flocked to this movie to shed their wholesome image.

I really enjoyed the story telling aspect of this film. The writing and editing was fascinating. There is very little narrative, this movie talks with it’s action. That being said, this is not a fast paced thriller. It's far more of a character study then a crime movie. If you are expecting a summer hit with lots of memorable action, you've come to the wrong place. 

Writer/Director Harmony Korine seems to take the totally absurd and make it realistic and raw in this universe. I never found anything to be incredibly funny or shocking while watching it, only after did I realize how bizarre this movie gets. At points is uses Britney Spears bubblegum culture to drive home corruption, but it doesn't feel out of place. It just feels honest and gritty.

The biggest flaw in Spring Breakers is how none of the young stars are charismatic or engaging. The four girls who go to Florida are tightly knit but completely interchangeable. It was difficult for me to keep watching, initially because of this, but in retrospect I don't think it was unintentional. 

James Franco as Alien is something else. For being such an incredibly over the top exaggeration of a stereotype, he is also the salt of the earth in this film. I still can't tell whether he is a good actor or whether he is good at choosing movie roles. His role turns this movie around in more ways than one. 

I have a hard time deciding whether I enjoyed this movie. I am grateful to experience something atypical from the Hollywood blockbuster, but there are times when it dragged and felt self indulgent. But again, that's sort of the point. When you get beyond the "shock value" of what you expect the movie to be compared to what you get, there is a satisfying journey that sneaks up and takes the audience by surprise. 

When you take away the stars, this is a low budget, gem that will likely get overlooked. If you do decide to watch it, make sure it's late at night. 

IMDB - Spring Breakers (6.1)

Wikipedia - Spring Breakers

Rotten Tomatoes - Spring Breakers (65%)

Amazon.ca - Spring Breakers

REVIEW: Oz the Great and Powerful

6/10 - The great and powerful cash grab. 

Does this movie add anything to The Wizard of Oz that makes a prequel worthwhile? No, not really.

Is it a great movie that makes you think? Absolutely not.

Compared to some other big budget bombs that have come out lately, this movie really isn't that bad. Zack Braff is very entertaining. The combination of the beautiful score, with the imaginative, saturated visuals engages the senses. I never found it predictable, as the whole movie relies on a suspension of belief. There is a lot of charm in this movie, as it tries to show hope for "goodness", bordering on cavity-inducing sweetness.

It's never lacking in something to look at, or laugh at. It also has lots of those "did you like that part?" moments.

That stuff kind of kills me, as a movie fan. Moments that are cinematic but totally not stimulating. Writer's have to put in those moments, and for the most part I think that's why people see movies, for the big action scene at the end, or that super funny part that they can quote with their friends. It's the overabundance of cinematic sequences that are either predictable, pandering, or irreverent in terms of story. Moments that are either visually stunning, engaging with action, incredibly funny, or obviously emotional. It's movie paint-by-numbers. Sad-part here. Funny-part here.

That's the essential problem with Oz the Great and Powerful- The story doesn't actually make sense, it just wants the audience to feel like it does.

Does Oz learn anything in the end? No. What's the deal with the witches? Why did the evil one become not important, the good one become evil, and the other good one, stay kind of goodish? I still can't make sense of that. And just to get the story straight... They free The Emerald City from the oppressive witch who pretends to be good so that Oz (the guy) can pretend to be good instead? Is this an improvement? It's thin. At best.

I think what lacked in story, translated to some of the performances, on screen. Playing a Wicked Witch ought to be the role of a lifetime. But the three witches are bland and boring. Does Michelle Williams pour her heart out while retelling Oz of the terrible lies her sister has told, about killing her own father? No. It's not even a big deal. She's just stating a fact.

Mila Kunis seems to want to bring the drama, but her role doesn't make any sense. She's a witch, doing nothing, who becomes love sick, and then turns evil against her will. She should be a powerful central figure, but she floats through it all. Should a powerful witch be so easily crushed by a broken heart?

Rachel Weisz has one of the best roles in the film, being the one major schemer who's truly evil and sinister. But she is hardly remarkable. Not to mention James Franco. I will admit, that their must not have had an easy task, presumably filming most of this on green screen. Perhaps that's why these characters don't seem to react or resonate. The original Glinda was glorious to behold. Oz ought to be smart as a whip, and charming beyond belief.

The movie also drags it's heels, trying to make unimportant sequences grandiose. It runs at around 2 hours and it should be 90 minutes, max.

I have a lot to pick apart in this movie, but that might be because on first watch I saw that it was technically sound, very entertaining, and the scenes kept rolling, as it should in a big budget spectacle. It's not really a terrible film, as long as you don't think about it afterwards.

IMDb - Oz the Great and Powerful (6.6)
Wikipedia - Oz the Great and Powerful
Rotten Tomatoes - Oz the Great and Powerful (59%)
Amazon.ca - Oz the Great and Powerful

My life, as a writer

It's me! It's me! It's really me!

Hello internet. Again.

I wanted to share another youtube video that I made with my friend Tracey. We discuss (or argue) what things we are good at, and what things we are bad at.

REVIEW: Snow White and the Huntsman

I have to preface this review by saying that I watched this movie back when it first came out, and thought it was a perfectly fine movie. Some weird bits. Went on too long, but pretty good otherwise.

That's why I bought the movie when it was on sale.

Now that I am watching it again, I don't know what I was thinking. This is a big pile of stinking garbage.

4/10 - I liked it once. Now I want to tear out my eyeballs it's so bad. Please don't make me watch this again. 

I take it some people in Hollywood think it's trendy to adapt fairy tales. Why anyone banked on this being a good idea is beyond me. (Maeby Funke?) There are a grand total of none that have been good. I have my score card to prove it.

Trying to turn the kids story of Snow White into a dramatic, stylized, action movie is the equivalent of trying to polish ... mud. I am supposed to take this "mirror mirror on the wall" stuff super seriously? And the seven dwarfs? That's straight out of Game of Thrones! Of course I'll think it's legit.

The redeeming factor is the fact that every scene with Charlize is golden. The lady can do crazy. Watching her is like watching a bad student art project, but with a $170,000,000 budget. She's fabulous but it's not movie redeeming fabulous.

The fact that I am expected to spend two full hours of my life watching Kristen Stewart prance around with the same "vampire lover" expression, is the mental equivalent of water boarding. Saying "this is bullshit" would be an insult to bullshit. I don't think I can remember anything she even did in the movie, and she's the damn protagonist.

At least Thor gave us something to look at. He gives a good effort. I can get the point he is trying to make, as his sexy voice narrates the movie. There is however, one point where "Snow" says some stuff to the people and they revolt against Queen Charlize (God Bless the Queen). This was clearly the Braveheart moment of the film. She was supposed to be the driving force to help the people. What a flop. She showed the ambition of a wet noodle. Do Kristen and Chris have chemistry? No, of course not. Not that I blame them. I don't think little miss "wahh" face couldn't make that happen, since there are no tight close ups with Muse playing in the background. Their romance is cringe-worthy because I feel sorry for these people, having to act it. This is a $170 million dollar film, and I feel sorry that the actors have to do this crap. What kind of movie is this?

In conclusion, if you want a Lord of the Rings style version of a predictable children's tale, with bizarrely amped up moments that appear to be totally irrelevant to the plot, as well as some of the worst acting ever recorded on film, this movie's for you! It's so slow, and dull that you might fall asleep and not realize!

I am reluctant to even link to this movie because I don't want to make anyone else endure this torture.

IMDB - Snow White and the Huntsman (6.2 - You've got to be kidding me)
Wikipedia - Snow White and the Huntsman
Rotten Tomatoes - Snow White and the Huntsman (48% - That's more like it)
Amazon.ca - Snow White and the Huntsman

REVIEW: Warm Bodies

8/10 - Best surprise of the year!

This movie makes me smile. No other zombie movie has ever done so.

Okay, so lets get the whole "rom-com" bit out. It's about a guy and a girl, falling in love, one just so happens to be a zombie. R (Nicholas Hoult) and Julie (Teresa Palmer) have great awkward chemistry on screen, but it's done with a nod and a wink. Julia is about as far from the "princess" trope as you can get. She doesn't need saving, she is living a happy life. When everything goes wrong, she saves herself, and fights the good fight. It's nice to see an empowered female in these movies, because more and more women are being marginalized on screen.

Warm Bodies is a satisfying ride and I don't say that lightly. It goes on an fresh journey, and the internal monologue provided by R is so funny with honest dry wit, I kept looking forward to it.

The supporting characters were great. The only complaint I have is that I wanted more from them. Rob Corddry, Dave Franco, Analeigh Tipton, and of course John Malkovich, were brilliant to watch. There are some excellent one liners that make me laugh, every time. The extreme dead-pan, awkward, the total lack of coordination, zombie boyfriend is fantastic, but it's the optimism that makes this movie endearing. There's something wonderful about a movie that doesn't just make you root for the hero, it makes you root for everyone.

I don't often discuss the technical parts of movies because they are usually boring, but the music was really outstanding. It has a moody contemporary soundtrack that adds a great deal to the tone. Some great 80's classics round it off, attracting hipsters and giving a familiar warm vibe.

I'm excited to read the book that this is based on, by Issac Marion. I don't know if it can compare to the charm that Nicholas Hoult has, but we'll see.

Definitely don't miss this one.

IMDB - Warm Bodies (7.0)
Wikipedia - Warm Bodies
Rotten Tomatoes - Warm Bodies (80%)
Amazon.ca - Warm Bodies

REVIEW: Jack the Giant Slayer

2/10 - What did I just watch? 

Oh boy.

What was I thinking?

This is a movie no one should have made.

Okay, it's not that bad, but it's pretty bad.

This is a modern Jack and the Beanstalk, blah blah, blah.

The characters are flat, one dimensional, and even with phenomenal casting can only be compared to watching a movie played by oatmeal. Did you know that Stanley Tucci was in this? Because I watched it and I already forgot. Nicholas Hoult, I will admit, is alright. He is a charmer, and a great young actor. Eleanor Tomlinson, on the other hand, is so forgettable I cannot even recall her characters name. The only other actor worth mentioning is Ewan McGregor, who definitely tried to squeeze the lemonade out of this lemon, and stole the show. Unfortunately it didn't improve this crap movie.

Jack and the Giant Slayer is long and dull. There is so much emphasis on action and showing off this CGI universe, that it becomes monotonous and dry.

This is a guy's story, and I am getting VERY tired of the token female roll. We can do better than this, Hollywood! A princess who is out of his league,  who is helplessly engaged to someone she does not love, who tries to help and shows a brave face, but is saved by the guy at the end. It's so dull and predictable. Aren't we over this, yet?

The fatal flaw in this boring movie is the central antagonist being the giants. They are slow, dull, dimwitted, dirty, and uninteresting. There's a cheat built into the story where the hero doesn't even need to beat the giants. What a huge waste. Instead of creating a insurmountable enemy, who looks impossible to defeat, but the hero manages to squeeze by with this wits at the last second... no wits are needed and the enemy is pathetic.

The kicker is that this movie is so long. It's fifteen minutes before he even gets the beans. Why wasn't that the first scene? Wasting time on something that should have been in the title is insufferable.

I'll lighten up a bit and say that it does have some entertaining qualities. I was quite shocked by the end when it goes all Lord of the Rings and there is a big violent battle, considering the rest of the film panders to a very young audience.

Sure you can make it though a screening, with it's big budget and special effects. But I doubt you'll want to see it again.

IMDB - Jack the Giant Slayer
Wikipedia - Jack the Giant Slayer
Rotten Tomatoes - Jack the Giant Slayer (52%)
Amazon.ca - Jack the Giant Slayer

REVIEW: The Avengers

9/10 - Quality movie, if you like watching stuff get blown up. 

What do you say about The Avengers?

The Marvel universe has become something you are either in or out. People tend to either be fans, or not care. This is problematic when a monument like The Avengers comes along, and you want to share what a great movie it is, but there are 5 movies that lead up to it, which explain the whole story. People who haven’t seen The Incredible Hulk might get by just fine, but will they understand without having seen Thor? Probably not. (Which sucks, because Thor was a 5/10 at best.)

As a writer myself, I am constantly amazed by the mastery that is Joss Whedon’s writing. He is formulaic and indulgent, but also tight and concise. He gives the audience all the moments they want, the hero shots, tension breaking laughs, one liners to take home. He takes  seven main characters and successfully builds them up, tears them down, then builds them back up again.

So. The Avengers is a movie about a bunch of people who save the world. It’s hard to say this is predictable movie when there are so many moving pieces. It has a great rewatch factor because every shot and ever line brings things forward together a little bit more, and you want to catch up on those references.

I think The Avengers is significant because audiences seem to have a desire for more complicated stories in their "typical action movie cereal bowl." Combined with other recent releases like The Dark Knight Rises, Skyfall, and Looper, I don’t think the mindless action movie is fitting the bill anymore. I'm not impressed by boring bad-guys and car chase scenes that go on for too long. These movies are making sure that even during the action, they are writing in beats to movie the characters forward and take them on an unpredictable journey. Isn’t that what an action movie is supposed to be? A fast-paced journey that leaves you smiling.

IMDB - The Avengers
Wikipedia - The Avengers
Rotten Tomatoes - The Avengers (92%)
Amazon.ca - The Avengers

REVIEW: Margin Call

8/10 - Great movie, great cast, surprising gem.

I don't often find movies that I think are going to be fast paced dramas that will satisfy the adult side of my brain.

Margin Call is an independent movie that peers into the world of the investment banking over a two day period. A very specific two days. It's the tipping domino that sent the US markets crashing in 2008. It's fascinating, brilliantly written, compelling, curious, devastating, and chaotic. 

I often talk about the predictability factor in movies, because to me that can make or break. A movie like this seems to break free of predictability because it's so character driven. I can only presume that the trailer or advertisements would reveal that the story revolves around the stock market crash. I had the great fortune of watching this based only on title and reviews, however the journey becomes clear early on, and that only serves to raise the stakes, instead of spoil the ending.

I am thrilled to see Kevin Spacey, Zachary Quinto, and Stanley Tucci play characters with so much texture go through something morally ambiguous, and deeply troubling. I don't think I've ever looked at an actor playing a corporate banker and initially felt sympathy for them. It's a real testament to the writing to take a movie filled with those characters, and not only make some sympathetic, but to clearly explain what's happening within the company, and make it dramatic. 

Is this movie without fault? No. It takes a good 20 minutes for the story to get in full swing, and I had to push through it to get to the goods. It's also quite depressing, overall. It has a little inkling of being too soon, and hitting too close to home. However, that only serves to push the tension of the movie, so maybe it's good. 

I would absolutely recommend this to anyone who wants to see a good drama. It's engaging and emotional, while being smart and concise.

IMDB - Margin Call
Wikipedia - Margin Call
Rotten Tomatoes - Margin Call (88%)
Amazon.ca - Margin Call

REVIEW: The Heat

7/10 - Funnier than expected. NO shopping or dating! Rejoice!

This was a funny movie.

I can’t remember the last time I thought a movie was simply funny. 2013 hasn't been great for comedies, so this is refreshing. The jokes keep rolling, and they are original. There was nothing that felt tired or already done.

I'm really starting to like Paul Feig (who has an impressive television career, directing big shows) for bringing to life these funny movies starring women. Chick flicks that aren't about shopping or dating. Thank god.

The Heat is a classic buddy cop idea. Sandy plays a by-the-books FBI agent, and Melissa is the tough, rebellious chick with an attitude.

The real essential element in a buddy cop movie is something magical and unexplained called “chemistry”. Kristen Wiig and Maya Rudolph (Bridesmaids) have chemistry. Jenna Fischer and John Krasinski (The Office) have chemistry. Sandra Bullock and Melissa McCarthy do not have chemistry. Thankfully, that doesn't matter that much because these two actors have such phenomenal comic timing.

By now, everyone knows the comedy that Sandy and Melissa bring. They don't stray far from this, but the combo is hilarious. It's a real unexpected delight to see Mullins' (McCarthy) Boston family, watching Ashburn's (Bullock) being super weird with her neighbors cat, watching the anticipated awkward "one ups man-ship" scenes. On top of that, seeing the hilarious cameo's from some other comedians makes this movie sail.

I think there are two big faults in the movie. The first is having two actors/comedians who never crack a single joke. Marlon Wayans has a great character and the audience likes him. He is a charismatic guy in whatever he does. That being said, he doesn't do much. He just exists in this movie without much attachment. The same can be said for Taran Killam. I was excited to see him on the big screen, but he played a totally straight character. Such a waste. Throw on a funny SNL accent and I would have been rolling in my seat. Yeah, it’s cheap laughs but better to get some laughs then none.

The second problem is that comedies have started to really come alive in the last few years, either being dramatic and funny, or extremely over the top exaggerated. The Heat is trying to go down a 21 Jump Street route with a predictable premise, but jokes that surprise and entertain. The problem is, 21 Jump Street did it better. Bridesmaids did it better. What can be said for a movie that's good, but not as good as the last one? I think these higher expectations is why there haven't been as many comedies, lately. The Heat doesn't do the predictable, and I'm glad we have something to laugh at this year, even if it's not an instant classic.

Is the story predictable? Yeah. Do we care? No. This movie is like a party trick, where you think it’s one thing but it turns into something else. Then you laugh so hard you spill your drink.

IMDB - The Heat
Wikipedia - The Heat
Rotten Tomatoes - The Heat (Pre-release, no rating)
Amazon.ca - The Heat